Whether the holidays re-charge or challenge us, how can we maintain progress and growth as we return to daily life? Vacations often present valuable breaks from life’s stressors: school, work, responsibilities, etc. They can serve as opportunities to take distance from daily routine, explore new places and experiences, connect with others and maybe get a few extra hours of sleep while we’re at it. For some, the holidays may also involve challenging experiences such as navigating strained relationships, re-living painful memories or managing loneliness and isolation. In therapy, we often dedicate attention to building skills and plans for promoting our mental well-being during the holiday seasons.
However, returning to daily life after the holidays often comes with its own challenges. The break from routine may make it harder to return to previous habits and skills (exercise, journaling, meditating, hobbies, etc.) which assist us in maintaining wellness during everyday life. Although spending time with family and loved ones over the holiday may be pleasant and exciting, it may also come with a crash in energy and social battery upon returning home. Strong emotions–of any kind–left over from the holidays may tempt us to act more impulsively or less skillfully, leading to increases in behaviors and emotional reactions we may have previously worked to reduce.
So how do we avoid the post-holiday crash which I’ve heard irreverently called “the f**k-it’s” and keep the progress we worked hard for before vacation? Here’s a few tips:
Plan ahead. Write down the skills and strategies which have benefited you in the past and write down a plan for exactly which ones you’d like to practice after the holidays, as well as when you’d like to practice them. If you have the opportunity, plan extra time to rest and adjust back to daily responsibilities between the time you return home and when you return to work/school. If there are triggers you anticipate arising following your break, work with a mental health provider or support to clarify a coping plan. If it helps, set reminders or calendar events to keep helpful skills and routines in the front of your mind.
Keep a positive schedule. Moving back into a routine after a holiday or vacation can make a “total crash” tempting. Try to keep positive experiences and events (not just work and responsibilities) on your calendar as something to look forward to. Go see the movie you were thinking about before the holiday. Visit some friends who are also returning home. Schedule a time to try a new and/or exciting hobby. Although down-time and rest are also important, having positive experiences to look forward to may help maintain energy and motivation to return to daily life.
Take some time for yourself. If the holidays lacked opportunities to take personal space, it may be helpful to prioritize time to be with yourself as you enter back into daily life. Journaling and meditation may be helpful ways of processing thoughts and feelings about the holidays after the fact. Creating a soothing environment (perhaps using the five senses) in your home space may help promote relaxation. Spend some time in comfortable clothing, light a candle/disperse an essential oil you find calming, cook a favorite meal and use softer lighting in your living space. Hobbies may offer enjoyable ways to connect with yourself again while also having a little fun. Just remember to balance your rest with meaningful engagement with life.
Connect with supports. Re-connecting with social supports present in your daily life–whether they be friends, family, support group members or anyone else–can be a great way to maintain accountability to staying on track while also promoting social connection. If you have a coping plan for the holiday or after, share it with a trusted support and keep regular contact with them. Schedule times when you can be around your social supports, whether it be to do something exciting or simply enjoy each other’s company. Even a text can be a meaningful way to stay connected and to share experiences from the holidays.
Ditch perfection. Even at the best of times, transitioning out of the holidays can be a bumpy ride. Although accountability and persistence are important for staying on track, giving into perfectionism may actually decrease motivation and increase shame. Progress is seldom linear, and becoming rigid about getting back to routines and habits perfectly after a holiday may set an unrealistic expectation. “Backslides,” although frustrating, can be important opportunities for learning and growth in the long-term. Give yourself some grace as you return to daily life, and focus instead on being persistent in practicing your skills and routines wherever possible. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or accountability as you go. Something is always better than nothing!
Mike Shirek, MA has a master’s degree from Lesley University in clinical mental health counseling with a specialization in expressive arts therapies. He received his Bachelor of Arts in psychology from Harvard University. He is a member of the International Expressive Arts Therapy Association and is working towards becoming a licensed mental health counselor and registered expressive arts therapist. Mike has 2 years of clinical mental health experience working in both partial-residential hospital and non-profit community settings. He has experience in exposure and response prevention (ERP) therapy, CBT and DBT skills, expressive arts interventions, trauma-informed care and narrative therapy techniques. He is committed to honoring individuals’ personal stories and experiences and seeks to empower individuals to pursue meaningful changes in their lives.
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